For years, John used alcohol to numb his pain. Eventually instead of a numbing device, the cycle became a prison that he could not get out of. His issues came to a head when he was asked by his manager to transport some company materials to another location, and crashed the company vehicle into a wall. He was tested and showed high levels of alcohol in his system.
After working together for a period of time, John was finally ready to go to residential treatment. Previously, he had declined this level of help. He notified his wife and kids, and they are supportive of his interest in treatment. His boss and company value John and wondered at times if "there was something wrong." They didn't say anything as John always showed up to work in a jovial mood and worked hard. John identifies as “one of those happy alcoholics” in our work together.
John went to residential treatment and struggled to engage fully and often joked that rehab felt "like a prison." This was upsetting to other group members who had been in the correctional system and told John, “Prison is no joke. You have no idea." The counselor and the group confronted John on the concept of a "prison" and if John's long-standing problems had a "prison like" feeling for him. He thought about it but had trouble seeing himself as someone with a severe substance abuse issue.
A skilled clinician knows that alcoholism and drug addiction is the "surface problem" and underneath is a trove of unresolved grief, trauma and unspoken emotions. It is also important to grab onto the feeling of "prison" and if being in rehab where one can leave whenever they want qualifies or if the true "prison" is the cycle of John's years as a depressed alcoholic.
Recovery and healing are not linear and can go in different directions. Having a strong connection to a therapist or coach can help John and others with similar problems learn to connect without substances.
In the next blog, I will review a range of counseling and clinical techniques to help our clients and loved ones with substance abuse or mental health
issues.