We are all working harder than ever, but employees are often happier, given the flexible work schedules that started during Covid and continue to the present day. 

Some managers feel that there are limits to having staff rotate between working from home and working in the office. Their biggest concerns are having the ability to mentor employees and having sufficient oversight to control employees. 

Yet, many employees and some managers feel that the myth of “at home is never as good” is being turned on its head as workers show that they are more focused, happy and as productive as ever at home. There is increased morale due to less commuting time and more time available to spend with families. At the end of the week, employees feel more energized and less depleted, than when they had to go in every day. 

There is so much more data available to study the impact of this new normal in corporate America. The old saying of present behavior is a strong indicator of future behavior couldn’t be truer than it is now. If an employee worked hard, was focused and worked well with management before the pandemic, they will continue this path from home. If the employee walks down the hall to get feedback or consultation on an issue, they will probably think nothing of picking up the phone or scheduling a zoom call to speak to the manager about any work issue that comes up. 

Employees who have their turn in the office will schedule social time after work hours or use a platform to have zoom calls with breakout rooms to stay connected to their team or department. ​

The hybrid workforce has added 1-3 hours to most peoples’ personal time by removing the commute from their daily routine of going into the office. When a person concludes their workday, they can go right to a child’s after-school activity, work out, or spend time with family. ​

Employees are also putting more priority on physical health, as they are less tired and stressed out than before. They can access their own food and go to the gym or take a walk at 5 pm - versus 7 pm when they had to travel. Many people say they move around more at home and can get outside more easily than they would when waiting for the elevators at work. 

The in-office work structure has become outdated and needs to be reconfigured. Only time will tell how this new hybrid workforce will perform in the long-term. The preliminary data says that a lot can be done from home, people work just as hard, and everyone is happier for it. 

​
Kay Gimmestad, LCSW-C is a business coach and clinician in New York City with 20 years of experience working in the profit and not for profit sectors of Human Resources, Health and Human Services. She has built a reputation for being highly skilled in facilitating behavior change while working with employees, both individually and in groups, on matters relating to performance management, substance abuse, crisis intervention, and stress/wellness. ​

Since the beginning of the “Covid Era,” I am hearing more about a fractured workforce and disengaged bosses. While most people in the workforce are grateful for more flexibility and the ability to work from home, there is less cohesiveness than there was pre-Covid.
 
In my counseling and coaching sessions, this topic is becoming more common. The issue is not a boss who is temporarily disengaged due to a deadline, but a boss who is always disconnected with little involvement with the staff on day-to-day issues no matter what the circumstances are.
 
*Mary, one of my coaching clients took a rare business trip to meet with an important client and when she returned, her boss never inquired about the trip. A month later, her boss requested a meeting to review her projects and she mentioned that would be a great opportunity to discuss her trip. Once the meeting took place, her boss never asked her about the trip. She decided to let the matter drop and if he was interested in the future, she would be happy to share the experience with him.
 
Mary and I strategized about other things she could do, given she enjoyed her job and had no plans to seek other employment. Mary decided to build closer alliances with her business partners and her staff. She made it a point to support them and share how their joint efforts were crucial to their work.
 
Mary works on a small staff and there are no other managers to fill in for her boss. Other staff on her team agree that their boss is uninvolved and that they will work closely together to make sure the job is done well.
 
Some Other Tips:
 
Self-Motivation: Remind yourself why you are at the company and the goals at hand. Whenever you start to think of what your boss should be doing, try to re-direct and work on a task for the good of the company.
 
Communication with Boss: Send brief emails to your boss updating them on your work and any issues that come up. Brief emails will more likely be read.
 
Keep Perspective: Remember that you do a good job and take pride in your work. Others on staff and clients are happy with your work. Work is just part of your life and hopefully you are supported by your family, friends and community.
 
Freedom and Autonomy: When a boss is uninvolved, this can give an employee freedom and autonomy to work up a level and put new ideas in place. An uninvolved boss will likely say yes to many suggestions as it would be too much effort to think it through and implement it. You can come up with the plan to make your idea a reality.
 
Leadership and Visibility: You can become the leader and give direction to staff and projects, given that your boss does not. This is a golden opportunity. If you seek a different job in the future, you can say that you had increased leadership within the company.
 
We have a tendency to focus on what is missing or “I could do this or that if my boss really cared.” I have outlined the many advantages of having a disinterested boss. I hope you will take advantage of them.
 
Happy New Year!

Kay Gimmestad, LCSW-C is a business coach and clinician in New York City with 20 years of experience working in the profit and not for profit sectors of Human Resources, Health and Human Services. She has built a reputation for being highly skilled in facilitating behavior change while working with employees, both individually and in groups, on matters relating to performance management, substance abuse, crisis intervention, and stress/wellness. ​

As November 8th is approaching, we are hearing that this year is one of the most important elections in recent history. More information is being reported to the American public about politicians and legislatures implementing laws and taking action that make it harder for some individuals to vote.
 
As I am becoming more knowledgeable about this, I am trying to do my part to reach out to individuals who may have more challenges with voting. One organization is The Center for Common Ground. Volunteers are given a list of individuals who have been identified due to cultural, economic and historical considerations. Some of these individuals do not have internet access. We write postcards with a scripted message and include information on contacting a resource to make sure they can get to the polls.
 
How can we help people in our communities and gain awareness around barriers to a free election system? One way is to know what the barriers are and why a portion of our citizens feel voting is not worth the effort.
 
The following are some potential barriers towards voting
 
Voter ID Requirements: Most people have a photo ID, but some don’t. Requiring this excludes people who use PO boxes or live in secluded communities, such as Native Americans living on reservations.
 
Language Barriers: Jurisdictions are required to allow citizens to vote. However, they do not translate information in the person’s first language. This makes it hard for some immigrants and communities of color to access needed information and to vote.
 
Funding Issues: It is getting harder for municipalities to have the resources to make sure everyone’s vote counts. This came to light in the 2000 election which highlighted outdated voting machines and confusing ballots. Remember the “butterfly ballot?”
 
Polling Center Closures: As funding continues to diminish, more polling places are closing down to cover wider geographical areas. This can lead to barriers accessing centers due to mobility issues and for those that do not have transportation.
 
Training and Education: In order for Poll workers to handle and manage the responsibilities on election day, increased training is needed so that workers can assist with provisional ballots, language assistance, accessibility and being aware of voter intimidation.
 
Partisan Election Officials: State and local officials handle elections. Many of these officials have a stake in the outcome that is favorable to their candidate.
 
In the last several years, the philanthropic community, lawyers, activists and grassroots organizations have joined forces to fight to maintain voter’s rights. If you know anyone who is impacted by these barriers, get involved and help to ensure that they can exercise their right to vote. Contact local government organizations, ACLU or the Justice department to make sure these citizens can access a polling center.
 
Additional resources are www.aclu.org, www.commoncause.org or your local election board.
 
Don’t forget to vote.

Kay Gimmestad, LCSW-C is a business coach and clinician in New York City with 20 years of experience working in the profit and not for profit sectors of Human Resources, Health and Human Services. She has built a reputation for being highly skilled in facilitating behavior change while working with employees, both individually and in groups, on matters relating to performance management, substance abuse, crisis intervention, and stress/wellness. ​

A few weeks ago, I asked a colleague if she had been traveling this summer and what her plans are. She had always taken wonderful European vacations to visit friends and attended international conferences. She said that she was staying home this summer due to a “flightmare” that she had this past spring when she was travelling. I told her that I had just learned a new word and loved it. I told her that I assumed that “flightmare” is a nightmare while trying to fly to and from one’s destination.
 
This has been a summer unlike any other and I know many people who took only one trip versus their usual two or three. Some have decided car trips are the best way to travel this summer, but what about those of us that cannot resist travel and are willing to take the risks associated with travel under Covid?
 
Pre-travel is often the most stressful as you are preparing, packing and trying to get work done. I have spoken to friends over the years and have learned some great tips to keep travel going smoothly.
 
Planning: If you are going on your own versus an escorted bus tour, I recommend starting to plan several months prior to your summer trip. That means exploring routes, hotels and the activities. You don’t want to feel the added stress of last-minute decisions regarding your itinerary. Leave extra time to get to and be at the airport as well as making sure your itinerary isn’t packed too tightly.
 
Money: If you are going with a significant other or a friend who has a very different budget than you do, discuss this before you decide to take a trip together and decide what you will splurge on and where you will spend less. Some people stay in smaller hotels and do simple restaurants with an affordable menu and then do a nice dinner on the last night of the trip. Decide if you want to splurge daily on tourist attractions or if you prefer to have 1-2 special events on your trip.
 
It is easy to get swept away by a friend’s photos of their fancy trip or pictures posted on social media. Make sure you plan a trip that is affordable for you.
 
Preparation This depends on where you are going and the length of time. For an international trip that is 1-2 weeks, starting a month ahead of time is a good idea. That
Gives you 4 weekends to get ready. You can make a list of what has to be done each weekend as well as any purchases for your trip. This includes getting foreign currency, purchasing items that you cannot get oversees, having the right reading material and activities to occupy your time during the long flight oversees.
 
Your Home: Try to clean, straighten and organize before you leave as it will be nice to come home to an organized home.
 
The Office: It is easy to spend your final days on vacation worrying about the voicemails, emails and work you are coming back to. Many people have asked that colleagues or outside vendors not call or email while they are away.
 
**Children: Make sure that everyone has a say whenever decisions have to be made or adjustments to the itinerary. If it is fun for children they can help pack, help plan and help pick restaurants. Have some coloring books, stories and devices to help them with long hours on a plane or in a car.
 
The most important reasons that we travel are to relax, experience a new place and to make new memories. Try to focus on your reasons for traveling in the first place. This will keep things in perspective if the weather or some of the destinations are not what you had planned.
 
**More info on traveling as a family or with children can be found on the blog Ytravelblog.com

Kay Gimmestad, LCSW-C is a business coach and clinician in New York City with 20 years of experience working in the profit and not for profit sectors of Human Resources, Health and Human Services. She has built a reputation for being highly skilled in facilitating behavior change while working with employees, both individually and in groups, on matters relating to performance management, substance abuse, crisis intervention, and stress/wellness. ​

In 2020, I wrote my last blog of the year which was titled, “The Year of Stress and Uncertainty.” It had been a long year since the pandemic broke out in March 2020. We were fatigued and ready to begin 2021 with hope of a vaccine and a cure. We survived the next year as well as increased political divisions and a recession in some sectors of the economy.
 
Now, as Covid will hit the two-year mark next month and restrictions are starting to lift, there has been a collective sigh of relief. However, we are beset by another global catastrophe, Russia’s invasion of Ukraine.
 
Coverage of the war can be especially difficult, given that so many American citizens fled war-torn countries to live safely in the United States. Many will be re-traumatized as they watch the citizens of Ukraine abruptly leave their country to seek solace in other parts of the world.
 
Given the slow-down of the last two years, people were forced to rethink their lives, create more work-life balance and set new goals. Now that we are finally coming out of the woods with respect to the pandemic, we have to cope with another major event. We worry knowing that it is easier to start and sustain a war after a period of destabilization, as historians have noted. For instance, WW2 started right after the Depression.
 
Even though the crisis is on the other side of the world, there are many immigrants from Russia and Ukraine in our cities, thus making us feel closer to that part of the world. The recent invasion has shaken our sense of security as we were just starting to feel secure again.
 
Where do we go from here and what do we do now?
 
Some ideas are as follows:

• We can start by focusing on gathering information from credible news sources.
• We may want to set some boundaries such as, keeping the TV off, and closing news briefs and apps on our phone.
• It can be helpful to spend time with friends and family and focus on other matters such as your activities, work and plans this summer. You may want to make an agreement with friends and family that you will limit your discussion of the war.
• Focus on a consistent routine as this may help you to feel that you have control over your life vs. worrying about the matters that you don’t have control of. Once you return to reading about the pandemic or the war, you may feel calmer and more able to manage.
• It’s important to ensure that you are getting 3 meals a day, some snacks, plenty of water, rest, and exercise if that feels helpful for you.
• Try to avoid maladaptive coping strategies like drugs, alcohol, overeating, and over spending.
• Postpone any big decisions until you feel you are in the right “frame of mind” to make them.
• If you feel sad or angry, try to speak to a trusted friend or professional. It is better to allow yourself to feel any emotions that come up. If you don’t have a counselor, Talkspace is a good place to start.
• If you have children or are in a caregiving role to children, make sure they know that you are available and open to answer any questions that they may have.

 
One of the most healing things that you can do is to reach out to organizations that are assisting people in Ukraine or refugees who are seeking asylum elsewhere. If you want to help out closer to home, many people within our own community have needs and can use support during these challenging times.
 
Here are some organizations that you can support:
 
Ukraine Humanitarian Fund  
Ukrainian Red Cross
Save the Children                                  
Unicef
Ukraine Crisis Appeal
 
These are tough times and I hope my tips provide some help as we all navigate what’s to come in the future.
 
 
Kay Gimmestad, LCSW-C is a business coach and clinician in New York City with 20 years of experience working in the profit and not for profit sectors of Human Resources, Health and Human Services. She has built a reputation for being highly skilled in facilitating behavior change while working with employees, both individually and in groups, on matters relating to performance management, substance abuse, crisis intervention, and stress/wellness.

​I started my December 2020 blog with, “At last, 2020 has come to an end.” The world was ready to kiss 2020 goodbye and everyone was excited for a new year, a vaccine and an end to Covid-19. I said that we would reminisce and talk about it for years to come, but that isn’t what ended up happening in 2021. Unfortunately, 2021 brought more uncertainty, frustration and two new variants; Delta and Omicron.
 
Despite this, schools and workplaces began to open, people started to venture out on vacation and attend entertainment venues. The vaccine became a contentious political issue with some insisting that they had a right to make decisions regarding their health regardless of the information provided by healthcare experts.
 
Despite the slow and steady progress everyone is ready to return to our normal lives. However, Covid has brought big changes to our lives, abruptly and without warning.
 
These adjustments brought a range of feelings and experiences. Many did not know how to navigate multiple issues while sheltered at home. Some thought to themselves, ‘how do I work from home, provide schooling for my children and be a good spouse or partner?’ The stress of being unable to go out and take time apart from family for one’s daily routine was one of the biggest challenges for many. The opening and closing of schools, added frustrations to an already stressful situation. It became impossible to have a regular routine which made daily life challenging for some families.
 
Some things to keep in mind:
 

• Our world remains uncertain. Hopefully this year we can think about who, what and how we want to live our lives.

 

• Make decisions based on the present and what is in your control. Do not try to plan for variables that do not exist or are unknown.

 

• Limit how much time spent reading, listening or discussing the pandemic. Try to find lighter topics to focus on that are fun and bring you joy.

 

• Be gentle with yourself and others regarding handling the pandemic. If someone cancels plans or a trip with you, try to be understanding and see it from their point of view.

 

• If you are attending a gathering and guests are not vaccinated, feel free to ask those that are attending to get a Covid test. If you get push-back, decide if you prefer to stay home or schedule an activity that feels safe and poses less risk.

 
I know many people who have restructured and redesigned their lives in the past two years and have embraced new ways to live in a post-Covid world.
 
We want to live our lives with purpose and meaning whatever life brings.
 
Have a safe and prosperous New Year!

Kay Gimmestad, LCSW-C is a business coach and clinician in New York City with 20 years of experience working in the profit and not for profit sectors of Human Resources, Health and Human Services. She has built a reputation for being highly skilled in facilitating behavior change while working with employees, both individually and in groups, on matters relating to performance management, substance abuse, crisis intervention, and stress/wellness.

Several years ago, I heard the term ‘courageous conversations.’ To me, it sounded like a new coaching practice used in organizations and companies. I was thinking about this concept recently when I had two conversations within a few weeks of each other. One went very well and the other did not.
 
Prior to the first conversation, I prepared my points, took a few minutes to clear my mind of other tasks, centered myself and closed my office door. The conversation started smoothy and seemed to go well with both parties satisfied of the outcome.
 
A week later, I was getting ready to call a manager after I had notified him that his employee should not be on the job due to ongoing mental health and substance use issues. It was a very hectic morning and the phones were ringing off the hook.
​
I had to call the manager quickly as I had less time that day for calls. I knew I hadn’t prepared as I had the week before. In my mind, I believed that the call may not go well.
 
The conversation started calmly, but due to both parties feeling stressed and having completely different ways of proceeding with this employee, the conversation went poorly and no issues were resolved. The other party said he would take the matter up with upper management and their company attorney.
 
I thought about both of these conversations and how I had prepared or failed to prepare and how that had impacted the outcome. It made me think of what is needed to have a successful conversation on a difficult issue.
 
Here are some tips for navigating difficult conversations:

• Approach the conversation with the goal of listening to the other person’s concerns vs thinking about what you will say. 

-Frame it as a chance to have a positive outcome instead of thinking, “this will be a difficult conversation.”

• Speak as soon as possible.

 
- Putting off or refusing to speak with managers about work issues can cause resentments and create a toxic work environment. This can cause poor concentration and may decrease one’s work performance. Some studies say that employees spend just under 3 hours a week dealing with office conflicts. This is a lot of time and energy that can be costly for an employer.

• Have the courage to be honest and direct.

 
-Talking honestly and presenting your viewpoint with clarity creates mutually respectful relationships. If you or the other party feels on the defensive, clarity versus an overly direct style is best.

• Stay centered.

 
-As we get caught up in the heat of the moment, it becomes hard to speak with clarity. Practice breathing and write down some key points, which will allow for flexibility. Making a structured script may be too rigid and could lead to a problematic outcome. Try to remain calm and tell yourself that a good outcome is possible for both parties.
 
The Bottom Line
 
Rethinking difficult conversations can be so important and useful both professionally and personally. In these moments; prepare, stay calm and be confident that you are communicating in the most effective way possible. This will lead to the best results for you and the other person.

Kay Gimmestad, LCSW-C is a business coach and clinician in New York City with 20 years of experience working in the profit and not for profit sectors of Human Resources, Health and Human Services. She has built a reputation for being highly skilled in facilitating behavior change while working with employees, both individually and in groups, on matters relating to performance management, substance abuse, crisis intervention, and stress/wellness.